S is for...Social Distancing

One of my super powers is the ability to speak in no uncertain terms when a situation requires it.

It means that I can say things, pretty much anything, and basically get over the response of others fairly quickly. Not only that, but because I am a compassionate and empathetic individual I’ll actually support those that I’ve spoken to afterwards; especially if I’ve upset or angered them. I’ll still support them even if I haven’t upset or angered them too. What can I say, I’m a great guy. Those of you that know me will probably be replaying every encounter that we’ve ever had and will go,

“Oh yeah, he actually does do that.”

I’m not sure what array of tone and emotion will be applied to that statement by everyone that knows me. But in a nutshell that is me.

So yeah, you’re welcome.

For some bloody reason, I actually care about people other than myself. Sometimes, I wonder why I should even bother. Because a lot of people are arseholes. Anyway, it’s taken years of practise getting good at the whole ‘say something that you know will probably upset someone and then ride the wave of ensuing emotion for the greater good’ thing. But you know, with great power comes great responsibility and all that shit.

So, now is one of those times.

Let me start by saying, I was in the pub on Friday. Not trying to be big or clever, or show off. Clearly not. Because if I was I wouldn’t admit something like that at this time, would I? At the moment, half the nation seems to want to hang you for doing that.

I’m just telling it like it is, just being honest. But not only that, I was at work all week too doing my best to support my community in my job. But it wasn‘t just last week that I’ve been doing this...no...it’s pretty much been my entire life. (The help my community bit, not the pub bit.) Check out my resume if you don’t believe me. Should I/shouldn’t I have been in the pub? I’ll be honest, I’m days away from writing the S is for...Social Justice Warrior entry. So, before anyone wants to question my decision making logic just keep that in mind. Don’t start with me on how to navigate life using the moral compass, because I will crush you. When it comes to those questioning how to use the moral compass and which way to go, I am a dot on the horizon compared to some people.

And then I’ll put my arm around you and support you because I’ll have probably made you cry. But don’t be silly I won’t put my arm around you just yet. You might have The Corona. Eeewww! Social Distancing and all that.

So...let me cut to the chase. People of the United Kingdom...and I only say this to them because this is where I’m from. This is my home. Other people can’t sort out their own fucking homes. But this is my home. This is our home.

DON’T BE A PIECE OF SHIT, AND STAY IN YOUR FUCKING HOUSE!

That’s what Boris wanted to be able to say to the nation yesterday but he can’t, because he’s the Prime Minister, and if he did it would all kick off. He’s got to be Politically Correct and all that bollocks. He’s got to represent himself in a ‘professional’ manner. I do too, but I also know what’s up and now how to handle the reality of a situation. Keep it real. Tell it like it is.

You’re welcome Boris.

This situation is bigger than any job, it’s bigger than any role, it’s bigger than you, it’s bigger than me(somehow), it‘s pretty goddamn fookin moosive!

This is a ‘lockdown’ of sorts, but it’s a pretty fucking tame one. They haven’t brought out the guns, water cannons, tear gas, and all that shit out just yet. But if some of you lot act like cunts they will. Because for the sake of humanity, they have to.

People have already died, and people will continue to die. This virus will S is for...Slaughter us all if we let it. That’s how shit like this works. How do I know?

For the record, whilst I was pretty shit at history class, I have heard of it. This isn’t completely unprecedented. I mean it’s a sneaky word for the media and people to use ‘unprecedented’, because it means something that has NEVER happened. Well fucking duh, EVERYTHING has never happened before. That’s how life works. But people are using the word like it’s an excuse to not know how to deal with this situation. Like ‘nothing like it’ has ever happened before. Which we know is bullshit.

Research ‘Historical Pandemics’. That should do the trick.

So, just keep it simple.

Don’t be S is for...

Stupid

Selfish

Silly

Do be S is for...

Smart

Supportive

Sanguine

It’s S is for...Symbiotic. For the benefit of you and those around you.

S is for...Stay indoors unless you really have to you fucking morons.

S is for...Social Distancing.

S is for...Smile and stay safe.

Something someone supposed said

”In a social context, digital technology introduces you to neighbours of the mind - people who are separated by distance, but close to you in thought and interest.” - Nick Harkway

Songs

Don’t Stand So Close To Me - The Police